I sit here (or, more accurately, lie here) on my bed and type my thoughts.
Superficially I am calm, relaxed - straight faced & emotion free, but inside I'm screaming.
Literally screaming.
It feels insane, but I'm aware of it, so am sure I'm not that.
I have an inner anxiety, despair and pain that aches to explode from my head, but it stays there - peaking & troughing throughout the hours as they pass. Nevertheless, my expression remains much the same. I am calm. And relaxed.
I am calm. And relaxed.
Repeat ad infinitum...
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